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'EGER' degil, 'CUNKU' degil, 'RAGMEN' sevin
Gönderme zamanı: 09/16/2009 10:59:11


'EGER' degil, 'CUNKU' degil, 'RAGMEN' sevin
Masumi Toyotome diye bir Japon yazmis bu yaziyi.
"Dunyada sevilmek istemeyen
kisi yok gibidir diye basliyor. Ama sevgi nedir?,
nerede bulunur?, biliyor muyuz?"
diye soruyor. Sonra anlatmaya basliyor... Sevgi uc
turludur.
Birincinin adi 'Eger' turu sevgi.
Belli beklentileri karsilarsak bize verilecek
sevgiye bu adi takmis yazar. Ornekler veriyor: eger iyi olursan baban,
annen seni sever. Eger basarili ve onemli kisi olursan, seni severim.
Eger es olarak benim beklentilerimi karsilarsan seni severim.
Toyotome en cok rastlanan sevgi türü budur diyor. Karsilik bekleyen sevgi.
Yazara gore evliliklerin pek cogu 'Eger' turu sevgi uzerine kuruldugu icin
cabuk yikiliyor. Gencler birbirlerinin o anki gercek hallerine degil,
hayallerindeki abartilmis romantik goruntusune asik oluyor ve beklentilere giriyorlar.
Ikinci tur: 'CUNKU' turu sevgi...
Toyotome bu tur sevgiyi soyle tarif ediyor: Bu tur sevgide kisi bir sey oldugu,
bir seye sahip oldugu ya da bir sey yaptigi icin sevilir. Baska birinin onu sevmesi,
sahip oldugu bir nitelige ya da kosula baglidir. Ornek mi? Seni seviyorum.
Cunku cok guzelsin (Yakisiklisin). Seni seviyorum. Cunku o kadar populer,
o kadar zengin, o kadar unlusun ki. Seni seviyorum.
Cunku bana o kadar guven veriyorsun. Seni seviyorum.
Biri disa gosterdikleri oteki yalnizca kendilerinin bildigi. Insanlar sandiklari kisi
olmadigimizi anlar ve bizi terk ederlerse korkusu buradan dogar.
Ikincisi de ya gunun birinde degisirsem ve insanlar beni sevmez olurlarsa endisesidir.
Japonya'da bir temizleyicide calisan dunya guzeli kizin yuzu patlayan kazanla
parçalanmis. Yuzu fena halde cirkinlesince, nisanlisi nisani bozup onu terk etmis.
Daha acisi ayni kentte oturan anne ve babasi, hastaneye ziyarete bile gelmemisler,
artik cirkin olan kizlarini. Sahip oldugu sevgi, sahip oldugu guzellik temeli
ustune kurulmus oldugundan bir gunde olmus. Guzellik kalmayinca sevgi de
kalmamis. Kiz birkac ay sonra kahrindan olmus...
Japon yazar toplumlardaki sevgilerin cogu 'Cunku' turundendir ve bu tur sevgi,
kaliciligi konusunda insani hep kuskuya dusurur diyor.
Peki o zaman, gercek sevgi, guvenilecek sevgi ne? Ve iste sevgilerin en gercegi:
Ucuncu tur sevgi: 'Ragmen' ...
Bir kosula bagli olmadigi icin ve karsiliginda bir sey beklenmedigi icin?
Eger turu sevgiden farkli bu. Sevilen kisinin cekici bir niteligine dayanip
boyle bir seyin varligini esas olarak almadigi icin Cunku turu sevgi de degil.
Bu ucuncu tur sevgide, insan Bir sey olduğu icin degil, Bir sey olmasina ragmen
sevilir. Esmeralda, Quasimodo'yu dunyanin en cirkin, en korkunc kamburu olmasina
Ragmen sever. Asil, yakisikli, zengin delikanli da Esmeralda'ya cingene
olmasina ragmen tapar. Kisi dunyanin en cirkin, en zavalli, en sefil insani olabilir.
Bunlara ragmen sevilebilir.
***
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